February 1, 2010
Me: See! I can handle things around the house!
Mom: I never said you couldn’t. You’re very helpful. You’re nice. You’re very nice.
Me: Well could you tell everyone else that?
Me: Really? Awesome.
Mom: Yeah. I’ll tell everyone else that. I don’t mind lying to those people. Haha.
January 16, 2010
Mom: I was watching an interview with Hannah Montana today. She’s gay! She had a girlfriend-
Mom: Hannah Montana. She’s gay.
Me: Hannah Montana?
Me: Hannah Montana, Miley Cyrus?
Me: No she’s not.
Mom: Yes she is. She was talking about her girlfriend. She was showing pictures of her.
Me: Mom, Hannah Montana isn’t gay.
Mom: Yeah, she was crying, showing her ring and showing pictures of her girlfriend.
Me: That’s not Hannah Montana, mom.
Mom: Who is that then?
Me: Tila Tequila.
January 10, 2010
Dec 31, 2009:
Mom: I’m going to eat this soup tomorrow.
Me: Oh, cause it’s the new year?
Me: Why are you supposed to eat soup for the new year?
Mom: Because it’s soupy.
Mom: How are you? Do you want a hug?
Me: I’m okay. No.
Mom: Good. *walks away*
Nov 27, 2009:
Me: Mom, you’re being naughty! You keep this up and I’m gonna take you home!
Mom: HAHAHA! Uh oh!
-Hours later at home-
Me: You’re being naughty again!
Mom: I’m already home! What are you gonna do now? HAHAHA!
Jan 9, 2010:
Voice on TV: …I wasn’t gay until I met Richard.
Mom: Hahah. I thought you weren’t gay until you met Michelle.
Me: YOU KNOW WHAT?!